Our sense of self worth flows from the value we place on ourselves. It shows when we interact with others. A healthy and positive self worth controls how we carry ourselves; how we speak about ourselves; how we talk to others; how we walk… The more we invest in our personal development, the higher our self worth rises.
In this post, we’ll look at 10 effective ways you can improve your self worth.
1. Change the flow of discussion you have with yourself.
It’s always easier to make disparaging remarks about one’s self. Probably, there was a task to do and you ended up messing things up. It’s easier to sit down and beat yourself up about it, than it is to try to encourage yourself to do better the next time. But while it’s not easy to do, saying positive things about yourself builds your esteem and increases your self worth. You are human and it’s only natural that you make a mistake—it happens to even the best of us. The difference is in how we react to it. The people you look up to, simply look at the errors and try to find ways to do things better the next time… instead of throwing a pity party.
If you keep talking bad about yourself to yourself, before long people around you will tune into that frequency and begin to talk down on you, too.
2. Devote your energy to things you can change.
American theologian Reinhold Niebuhr prayed: God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.
Devote your energy to things you can change. Sometimes, life brings us to situations that are beyond our power to change. It could be the loss of a job or a dear one. Again, it is default setting to sit and whine but it is wisdom to focus on what is within your power to change.
3. Don’t blow matters out of proportion.
It’s not everything that’s worth fighting about. There are scenarios where you have to turn a blind eye to some people and their shenanigans. The wisdom is in knowing how to go about conflict resolutions amicably. When you constantly make mountains out of mole hills, you start to come off as a nag, and people find that trait infuriating. And with time it begins to color how they relate to you. Your self worth will be the thing to suffer the backlash. Resist the temptation to create drama. Be wise in your dealings.
4. Don’t be a people pleaser.
If you don’t feel comfortable with any idea, don’t go along with it. Wait till you are cleared, and convinced, before you join in. If any plan makes you lose your sleep, don’t be afraid to say no. Sometimes, the persons involved may not understand your choice; they might even pick offence but that shouldn’t make you pursue anything that robs you of your peace.
5. Find yourself worthy of greatness.
As you go through life, that point will come when you are offered with life changing opportunities. Don’t look down on yourself and think you are incapable. Boldly embrace the tasks and give your best to it. You were asked to do it because you were thought capable. Stretching yourself with tasks like this enhances your growth and boosts your self worth.
6. Don’t let anyone discourage you from the pursuit of your goals.
Have you ever had people say your goals are outlandish and unattainable? Probably, they even scorned you and named you a fool, for wanting to accomplish such things. Let the comments roll off your back, like water rolls off a duck’s back. Ignore such comments. And if you are closely surrounded by people who continue to make mockery of your goal, begin to put a healthy distance between yourselves. If you entertain such negativity, with time it’ll begin to color the lens with which you view yourself.
7. Let your words reconcile with your actions.
Do not let people get the notion that you are just a loud mouth—this becomes the case when you live a life of hypocrisy. Do not be all talks and no action. If you won’t do it, don’t brag that you will. And if you will, just do it! Let the life people see you live, reconcile with the message that you’ve preached to them.
8. Learn to stop feeling guilty when you have to refuse an offer.
Not every opportunity that comes your way is in line with your purpose for your life. Therefore, you shouldn’t agree to the terms just so the person at the other end of the line doesn’t get offended. And you don’t have to explain your choices—especially in cases where it’s clear that they don’t wish to understand. Say no and boldly stand your ground without any feeling of guilt.
9. Trust that inner gentle voice.
Learn to follow your instincts; it would hardly lead you astray. For instance: someone brings a business proposition to you and while you’re about signing the dotted lines, there arises a sick feeling in your guts that won’t let your mind rest. Take a pause and carefully go through the offer again.
When you ignore your instincts and it ends up being right, it’s always hard to get over the feeling of regret. Reaffirm your confidence in yourself by following your instincts.
10. Live life at your own pace.
Set your goals realistically and put in your best efforts at achieving them. Measure your growth by your own parameters. We all are at different phases in our journey. If as a beginner, you keep comparing your growth with that of a professional, you would end up getting depressed. Boost your self worth by living at your own pace. Just keep moving.
And in Ralph Waldo Emerson’s words, “adopt the pace of nature: her secret is patience.”
Be patient with yourself and trust your life’s journey. Devote yourself to personal development.